Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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