I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
