it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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