I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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