I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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