Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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