She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize