I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
