come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
