My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
