Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize