I want to walk on stilts...naked
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
