Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
