She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
