and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
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