You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize
