We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
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