Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
