shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize