I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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