i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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