Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
