I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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