"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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