In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
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