i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
