did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
