Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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