I don't think brook has ever known best
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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