so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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