It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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