But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize