I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize