is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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