During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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