Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
