Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
