i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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