Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize