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New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
