apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
