I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
