I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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