so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
