he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
