so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
