Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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