is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
