Small penises have feelings too.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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