How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
