so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
